I have monitored the days. They are running. No, trust me, they are sprinting past us. It’s hard to keep up. Even the Usain Bolts and Tobi Amusans of this world can’t keep up with them. When was it again that we put up Christmas trees and sang carols? Not that I cared much; my […]
Let me confess, I have been cheating on you. Can you even blame me? There are all kinds of social media platforms these days and one can get carried away, updating one’s life on all of them while abandoning the one space you have created solely for that purpose. So I have been writing, alright. […]
I am one of the not-so-fortunate Lagosians who live in the same compound as their landlords. Let’s not pretend it’s an easy thing. It is like living in the same building as your in-laws, or your boss. You’re under constant eagle-eyed scrutiny, and in Naija speak, you cannot drink water and drop cup. Well, it’s been […]
The one thing that, even if you whine and cry and refuse to eat and sleep all day, will never change, is the passage of time. The clock will keep ticking. The sun will keep setting, and those quiet grey hairs will keep waiting till the day they can sprout with joy and never look […]
So, in its entirety, my experience of being a 9–5er hasn’t lasted more than a year. Yep, and I have been out of school for six, so do the Math. It’s not that I have spent the remaining five faffing. Agreed, there was some faffing, but it’s the kind of faff that puts money in […]
I didn’t pour water on my head for the first time in one year today. Trust me, I didn’t feel very much like myself. I would go on to say to myself, “Who the hell are you, Stranger?” Myself would go “…Errr…I’m you, Dude!?” And then it would dawn, that I am in fact me, […]
I sneaked into the Nigerian Fathers’ Association (NFA) meeting the other day with an extra-large shirt, a fake mustache and paunch, and white patches in my hair. They couldn’t tell I wasn’t one of them, even you would not have been able to tell. So at the meeting, all Nigerian fathers gave reports and got […]